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[allgotrabies]

Hey, it's Annie, you know what to do.

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[allgotrabies]

"What helps for you?" She's asked this before, but it was early on in their friendship. It wasn't so long ago, but things move fast on the Barge, things are constantly changing.

[loveisall]

"It helps to be reminded of exactly what I am reminding you. That I cannot change the past. I can punish myself until the end of time for it, but it doesn't matter. It won't bring back the lives I've taken. I can only focus on what I am doing now. Examine what I am doing now."

He brushes his fingers through her hair.

[allgotrabies]

"I know you probably don't think so, or maybe just not all the time, but you're such a good person. I'm sorry I let you down." Closing her eyes, just feeling his fingers brushing her stress away. "I hear what you're saying."

[loveisall]

"Do not worry about letting me down," he says softly. "I have forgiven you, but my opinion is not the one that matters. It is easy for me to forgive you."

[allgotrabies]

His opinion matters enough that knowing he's forgiven her lifts so much of that pain, though. "I'm going to do what Quill said. Figure my shit out. Then I think I can forgive myself."

[loveisall]

"That is wise. Vague. But wise," he sits back and pulls her against him again. "It is a shame that your leprechaun is so ill tempered. And likely hates me."

His lips quirk up slightly.

[allgotrabies]

"Oho, my leprechaun? Why would he hate you? You're the best vampire here," she teases, but there's a note of real curiosity.

[loveisall]

He just grins. "Because I was a little aggressive in my protection of you, I think." He sits back. "It was difficult to keep my control, if I'm honest. He's a faerie. Faeries in my world..."

He trails off. "It is complicated."

[allgotrabies]

"I'm guessing they aren't tiny, flying around in green leotards," she murmurs, but has a hard time imagining what else they could be.

[loveisall]

"They aren't tiny. They're fairly rare. But they've been hunted to extinction -- by vampires," he adds. "Because they are, well," he huffs out a laugh. Very rarely is Godric embarrassed. But he is embarrassed by this.

"Their blood is the equivalent of a drug, I suppose. They, dammit, Annie. They taste very good. And the legend is that they make it possible for us to walk in sunlight."

[allgotrabies]

She doesn't understand why he's embarrassed but she's grinning at him, loving the fact that he is.

"How would a vampire test that? Get all coked out on a fairy and then run out into the first crack of dawn?" A pause as she reflects on all the drugs she's taken, or seen others take. "Actually, I guess I could see that. ...I'm guessing you haven't bitten one? Or does the sunlight thing only work for a little while?"

[loveisall]

"Oh I have before. But I was not enough of an idiot to try walking in the sun," he laughs. "I was in bed by dawn, as I should have been."

He leans back, shifting so he can lie on the couch, his head in her lap. It's a reversal of their usual positions, but he wants the comfort this time.

"But Sweeney smells like that, Annie. I could have put my teeth in his wrist and it would have been so easy." He lets out a sigh.

Not his neck, though. Never his neck.

[allgotrabies]

"He smells really fucking good to me, too," she admits. "I figured it was just the whiskey and cigarettes, or my mood 'cause Bobo set me off, too. But now I wonder if it's not the same for me."

She strokes his hair, lingering just above his ears and along the hairline where most people are more touch-sensitive. There's a low, very nearly inaudible note in her voice that isn't human, but is deeply, unmistakably protective of Godric even when she isn't speaking of anything like protecting him. He's safe with her.

"How d'you handle being around him?"

[loveisall]

"Hundreds of years of self control," he laughs. "And I focused on the cigarette smoke." He raises his eyebrows at her. "Though now I simply want cigarettes. I have not smoked in centuries."

[allgotrabies]

"I bet cigarettes were better then," she sighs. "I quit for about a month. I can't get cancer and I can outrun a train so I figured I can give myself that weakness."

A worrisome thought occurs to her. "The other vampires won't try to hurt him, will they?"

[loveisall]

Godric sighs, but there's steel in his words. "No. That is something unique to my world. But I have already cut my ties with Nadja," he tells her softly. "If I must kill her for this, too, I will."

[allgotrabies]

"I'm sorry," she says, frowning. She knows his relationship with other vampires is already complicated. "I got your back though. In however you want me there."

[loveisall]

"I do not want you there," he smiles. "I can take care of Nadja myself." He pulls himself up enough to kiss her. "I know you will be there for me. But she continues to threaten Anita, and I cannot abide that. Anita is human and an inmate. Nadja should know better, but she lets her emotions rule her."

[allgotrabies]

She kisses him back, warm and fond.

"I know you can handle her. This is he having your back now, too. Like this." Offering the comfort back that he so frequently gives her. "I hope she doesn't do anything stupid though. The second you realize you locked yourself in, it's... Bad. And I don't think I'm as, um, emotional as her in the first place."

[loveisall]

"No," he assures her. "You aren't. But bloodshed is the last thing on my mind. She's angry with me, but I'm stronger than her. I'm hoping that will keep her at bay for a while."

He shrugs, sitting back again. "But enough of Nadja. Back to your leprechaun." And he deliberately uses that word again. "Did he hurt you? Let me see."

[allgotrabies]

Another laugh, "Does he know he's mine?"

She lifts her shirt to show him bruises that are nearly healed. "He never punched me really. Not in the face especially. Not as hard as her could have, and... I don't know. It felt like play. It wasn't frightening."

[loveisall]

Godric sits up and inspects the bruises, running his fingers gently along the bruises, not pushing against them, only tracing them. He tsks softly. "If only we didn't have to be careful about blood," he says lightly. "You would not need to outsource for this sort of play."

He's mostly worried about either one of them losing control one day.

[allgotrabies]

"I've been thinking about that," she murmurs, turning slightly so he can see the ones still dark on her back. "Iris had to do stuff to her blood to be one of us. I know she had to, and it worked, because we're still buddies. I usually can't get near other wolf girls. But I don't know if she can change people with her blood. And... I am never going to change anyone again."

[loveisall]

"I think that's wise," he tells her, inspecting the others, placing a hand on hers, silently telling her to put her shirt down. The bruises are acceptable for him, and definitely not the worst he's ever seen in his life.

She'll be fine.

"So what are you saying?"

[allgotrabies]

She arranges her shirt back down, and tugs lightly on his to urge him to lay his head on her lap again.

"I want to ask her if she can take away the thing in my blood that can turn people." There are so many reasons for it, but the largest is what she told him: she never wants to turn anyone again.